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Archive for the ‘lupron’ Category

First day with my  decreased dose of lupron, doesn’t even sting anymore.  my big problem today is I just can’t stop crying! I have no idea as of why though, some are happy tears others are sad the rest I think are confused themselves as to why they shed. I know I am having a really hard time with my husband being away from me, but as of 1:10 pm tomorrow he will be back in my arms safe and sound. I know the entire IVF process is emotional I’m just annoyed with the overabundance of it.  Right now a lot of it I  feel is from the stupid nurse practitioner droning on and on about how painful the pregnancy is going to be, and as of lately (could be hormones) I just have a feeling like I don’t have many people who feel like I’m strong enough to go through this process and be a mother. It’s all I ever wanted to be! ever since I was 10  years old, I wanted a big family. I worked so hard and did everything the doctors told me to do; lose weight, stop smoking cigarettes, it took me a long time to do so but I did it. I smoked 3 packs a day for 9 years.  this november 19th will be 6 years free of smoking. the losing the weight well that’s the tough part for me, I would lose 30lbs then become pregnant then miscarry then gain it back, and repeat process 3 more times (4 miscarriages). my last two babies (2 ectopic pregnancies) were the worst since they were the farthest along. one of which even had a heartbeat. I gained the 30 back plus another 30. I was also going through figuring out why I had such horrible pain everywhere (ended up being fibromyalgia/seronegative RA) it took 10 years to finally get a diagnoses and to have people stop looking at me like a was just trying to get attention. Well I’m done with the feeling sorry (hopefully) I  am feeling overwhelmed and frustrated.  sorry for the random venting…

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Missing my hubby :(

it’s so weird, when my husband gives me the lupron injection it doesn’t hurt it stings for like 5 seconds but doesn’t hurt. For the last 2 days I gave me the injection since he is out of town and both of them hurt really bad.  oh well I just have till thursday and he will be back.  so I’m waiting on the ivf clinic to give me a call to see if I decrease the lupron to 5 units instead of 10, and I’m waiting on a new obgyn to give me a call back to see if they can work me in because they can do same day labs before 4pm  just what the ivf clinic needs and I wont have to drive 5 hours every other day. I pray that can fit me in but I am prepared to do what I have to do if they can’t.  I slept so horrible last night.. I always do when Jason isn’t here. He  is ready to come home already lol he says he just misses me like crazy and is just not interested in this years conference, I think it’s because it’s not Vegas this year lol. Well that and probably stabbing me with needles every morning.

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Blah Sunday

Took hubby to airport at 4am this morning 😦 I hate being without him but he will be back thursday afternoon. I had to give myself the injection today I got to use to him doing it though it was easy since it isn’t the one you have to mix up. so instead of just sulking cause my baby isn’t here I took my dog, stormy, to the dog park for a few hours and walked about 3 miles. she loves it there she has 7 acres to run around and play with other dogs there are doggy water fountains and fire hydrants all over the place lol . she is 8 years old, she’s half lab and half blue heeler. she is one of the sweetest dogs I have ever owned. not to mention a big time daddy’s girl 😦  now I guess I will do some cleaning and wait for my baby’s call.

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ok I am noticing a pattern here every time we do the injection on the right side under my belly button it hurts, left doesn’t hurt at all… the right side hurts for a few seconds. so ultrasound went good I think said the uterus looked good and that I have follicles already on my ovaries 🙂 ! though I thought it was early for that lol I do however have a tiny cyst on one of the ovaries only 1.2mm. blood test I guess will be back in a couple of days. so now I’m waiting till 3pm to go get the last MRI done. More good news the hardship loan got approved from his retirement fund. less than we thought but that’s ok it buys the last follistim that we needed to ensure we can finish this round of IVF.  I feel like I can half way breathe again lol I just can’t shake the worries so far every step we take with the IVF a road block tries to stop us going forward. God I really hope this works this time around  I otherwise it will have to wait till we finish getting back out of debt again

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The shot barely even stung today! We went back out today to see about a loan still and it looks as though we have a high chance of getting one but can not get it till at least the 29th this month, we also heard back today from the retirement fund about the hardship withdrawal and it looks as though we will be getting that but not as much as we thought we would have. that’s okay though as long as it covers this IVF cycle I’m good with that if by chance we would need to do another cycle we will save up this time before getting started.  So far our diet is going real good and I went for my old 3 mile walk today which felt great outside and was just beautiful. I figure I’m going to walk one day and the next I will stay home and use the stepper for  an hour, at least till I can build back up to doing the 5 1/4 mile plus swimming for an hour 1/2 plus the stepper for an hour a day. but right now I am hurting and am just so tired I figure as long as I do some type of exercise  for an hour a day it will at least let me maintain… hopefully.  Tomorrow morning I have to go get my ultrasound and blood test to see is there are any cysts and I don’t remember what else she said they were doing. that afternoon I get my MRI done on my right wrist I can’t wait to finish up all of these dr appts already….

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So today’s shot not bad at all, the normal 5 second sting then it was good.  Jason and I stayed up late last night talking about different things two of them being the IVF money and  our diet/exercise.  I was not happy about getting back up to 213 and Jason had gained about 7 lbs also. not to mention both Jason and I’s sugar levels were getting higher.  So we sat down and made a commitment to the low-calorie/low sugar diet and 2 hours a day working out.  Today’s went good till now lol I’m hungry but I not it wont kill me to just hold out a few hours and then have a low cal low sugar lite snack then off to bed. so we will see how this will do i still have a month or so till we head in for the gathering to lose as much as possible. Now the IVF money that was a different story…. It’s just hurting us so bad bills are starting to be held off till later and neither one of us likes that at all! we just got out of debt before we started the IVF process. So today we spent all day long going to place to place trying to get a loan and so far it’s a no go… The loan would help us out with getting out of debt again and finally getting the follistim paid for so I can stop freaking out about that … We have the money for it but not in time…. Oh plus my lovely start of cycle landed today which is a good thing but it lead me to find out that what we had set up with my OB/GYN and my IVF clinic is not going to work out with the blood draws. Now they can however do my ultrasound and blood draw thursday but after that it looks as though I will be driving to Dallas every other day once I start the menopur and the follistim to check levels. Man that’s a 2 1/2 hours drive there  and back!?! 5 hours of driving for prob 15 mins at the clinic for blood work SUCKS…. I told Jason we may want to check out an extended stay hotel for the last two weeks during this process and see what would be cheaper the hotel or gas back and forth. although if we can’t get this loan we may have to stop and wait a month till we have all the money.. Hope everyone has a wonderful night.

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Lupron day 4

Oh my goodness today’s shot hurt so bad! I’m hoping it was just the needle since it stopped hurting after the needle was removed. I feel so achy all over and no energy and no motivation. I want to try to get back into my old routine but right now is not a good time. It has been raining all week-long and the mosquitoes are really bad and two people in my city have the West Nile virus and one of those unfortunately has passed away, so not wanting to take a chance on it. I have my MRI of my wrist today and my bone density scan I just want to get these over with already. Just tell me already if I have it or not cause wither way I can’t do anything about till after baby is here. I think i am mostly just tired of the constant go go go…

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